Friday, July 23, 2010

Two Cent Fridays....

Ok So I am starting something here..I am going to open up the blog to YOUR two cents each Friday.  I will start the topic and we can go from there.

Tonight's topic is:

How do you feel about the way others have reacted to your loss?  Do you get judged? Do you feel abandoned?  Do you get called names? Do you feel alone because of this?

 I have had ALL of these done to me, and more.  How have I handled it?  Well I really was not given a choice.  Most responses were for us to "take time to heal" and then we will reconnect, as if I want to reconnect with someone who thinks I as too miserable to be around.  Gimme your "Two Cents" on what you think a BLM should do when under this circumstance?  I like to think "weeding out the bad ones" works best. But, in the end you realize that there are not much left, but those that ARE left are the most compassionate and understanding people in your life.  I am blessed with plenty of those people.   

So please, leave your "Two cents" here....and we will see how this goes...


  1. I have had many different reactions from people in my life. The ones that hurt the most are the ones that just choose to ignore any of it even happened, or make it seem like losing Hannah meant nothing. I will give you an example. My MIL had to go for a test in the outpatient part of the hospital I gave birth to Hannah at. he said, is that where you were? Yea. I was in outpatient. Are you kidding me?! It really burned me up inside and tests my ability to "love" certain people. But I try my hardest, through God's grace, to hope that it is just simply ignorance and not intentional. I know you have had some difficult dealings with many people and I just don't understand. We are hurting so badly, yet it seems people expect us to be the ones to appologize for the pain. Lots of love, Ann. xxoo

  2. Oh Katy, you know I can relate all too well...i think its Family that kind of hurts the worst. I have seen friends and "strangers" and I use the term "strangers" loosely as they know more about me than the others do. I just wish people would come pre programmed with how to act towards us. I have heard such awful things being said to so many BLMs in the past few days and its so disgusting!! people need to get a clue and a filter in their mouths!!

  3. If people knew how I really felt about my loss...they would probably think I was crazy! Grief...this kind of hard stuff. One thing I have noticed is how my attitude about most things in general has changed. It's kind of an "I don't give a shit" attitude. I don't care that you're getting a divorce. My baby died. Top that? I don't think so. I don't care that your baby is depriving you of sleep and you want some peace and quiet. My baby died. I wish I was sleep deprived and needing some peace. I don't care that you had to work overtime and you hate your job. My baby died. I would shovel shit for the rest of my life if my baby were here with me. I think you get the picture. I can't handle it when people complain about petty things. My baby died. And it really can't get much worse than that. So I guess my point relationships with people have changed more because of me than because of them. Because I can't listen to their stupid problems without thinking that they have no idea what real problems are.