Today on this 'Two Cent Friday" I would like to ask my fellow BLMs what their 'two cents' are on Guilt.
I have come across many of these thoughts myself since losing my daughter and even though I know I did EVERYTHING I could have to protect her, the thoughts do creep in my head from time to time. Did I eat right? Did I sleep right? Did I drink enough water? What if I went to the Dr. sooner? What if I did this or that? These thoughts on their own can drive a person crazy. It is enough to slow down the healing at any given point.
My two cents on it? If you TRULY believe it was your fault, it most likely wasnt. I really believe that guilt is just a part of the grieving process and ANY good mother would come across a moment of it or not. That is what mother's do. They protect their babies and they worry for them. Just like when a child falls and scrapes thier knees, you ask yourself "Why did I not run and grab them quick enough"....I believe though the situations are different, that the idea of having to keep our babies safe is a major part of the guilt.
What would you tell a fellow BLM that is really blaming themselves? Would you suggest therapy? Would you suggest talking with other BLMs to feel less guilty? For myself, therapy has helped a lot. I hear from an 'outsider' that it is not my fault and that really validates me. I also repeat to myself "I did NOT do this. This was my body, but it was not ME" That has seemed to help as well.
Thanks for participating in this week's Gimme your two cents...this question comes from a very close BLM of mine who really feels so guilty months later. Any advice you can giver her, please leave it here. Even how you were able to come past this point can help her out.